Why You Numb Out and How to Stop

After conversations with two clients about numbing out and escaping with food, I got the message:

It is time to share with you 3 tips to stop numbing out and start actually comforting yourself.

I share a little of their stories and mine. So guess what? You aren’t alone.

Listen in to discover more about these three tips to stop numbing out:

• Set a timer with an exit for your numbing

• Determine how long you will sit with discomfort

• Include mini-fun and comfort breaks throughout your day

The 75 Hard Challenge is NOT for you

When a new friend told me he was doing 75 Hard, I decided to check it out. At first I got excited about it.

I like a challenge.

And because I was already doing most everything on the list, I thought “Cool. It will encourage me.”

Then as I read the full website, all of the guru-speak gave me a creepy-vibe. The more I read, the more red flags went up.

The guru-speak is common in pseudo-fitness programs.

Not just 75 Hard.

How can you know if a program is right for you?

Listen in.

Learn how to evaluate if a program is based on principles and science — or just the creator’s idea.

Would you like me to help you evaluate a program you are considering?

Please reach out to me for a free 15 minute consult. I want to make sure you are set up for success.

Simply email me at sheri@thevireolife.com

3 Unusual Ways to Improve Your Gut Health

Two weeks ago at the Nourished Festival I spoke with 495 participants on Improve Your Gut to Improve Your Brain. So many people reached out after with their stories and insights.

I am sharing with you three unusual tips from the workshop.

Guess what? It’s not all about food.

(Yes. Some of it is about food — check out this recent blog post for those steps to take.)

These off-the-beaten-path tips are simple and they will fit in your busy lifestyle. And I promise, your personal ROI is great.

To get the full workshop replay, email me at sheri@thevireolife.com.

How to Stop the Food Police

Would you like to eat without worrying about being judged? It’s time to tame the shame. It’s time to take away the whistle of the “food police”.

They may mean to be helpful. They may not even know their words are criticizing.

But even if their heart is in the right place, you need to set boundaries with these tips.

Why?

If you don’t, you will keep feeling judged. You’ll keep sneaking food to avoid the shame.

(I know. I’ve been there.)

Listen in and learn how to (kindly) Stop the Food Police.

Mindful Eating Meditation

Do you leave the holiday meals miserable or content?

A few days ago I was talking with a client about his desire for food to be a place of celebration, not a source of suffering.

It is possible.

It starts with a simple, powerful practice. This practice will shift how you see yourself in relation to food.

You will increase your desire for what you want. Doing what you want will be easier.

What's this practice?

Visualization.

Here’s a “just follow along” guided meditation to make it easier to eat well.

For a “make your own” visualization, try these basics:

1. Think about how you want to feel, physically and emotionally, after eating.

2. Picture your mealtime or party. See yourself making the choices you want. See yourself enjoying the food and stopping when you are no longer hungry.

3. How will you feel? Sense the peaceful and joyful emotions and being proud of yourself after eating.

You can visualize anytime - while you are brushing your teeth, shaving, or as you go sleep ...

The key? Practice daily.

How to Stop Being Tempted to Eat When You Aren't Hungry

You walk by the pantry and the snacks inside start whispering your name. You try to ignore them.

But then when you get frustrated or bored, their whisper returns.

“Come back to us. Just have one. You’ll feel better. You need some fun in your life. We’ll make everything ok.”

Do you ever crave sweets or salty food this way?

Then do this.

1. Watch the video

2. Take the challenge

3. Put in the comments one of your answers to the challenge.

See you on the other side of freedom.

Three Ways Your Friends Make It Easier to Be Healthy

You don’t have to change your friends so you can make healthier choices. But you do need to ask a few friends to help you in these three ways.

How do you decide which friends to ask?

Listen in and you’ll learn the four critical traits of friends who are supporting you.

If you don’t have a community with these four critical traits, then you need join me for my Break Free Retreat. It is a women’s only retreat. (Sorry, guys.)

The retreat is a powerful time to develop friendships with women who are on your same journey and can offer the support you need to succeed.

Here’s your details on the retreat. Feel free to email me any questions at sheri@thevireolife.com

This will make you Stop Craving Sugar

You don’t crave sugar for “no reason.”

I’ve found there are 5 common sugar-triggers and one is likely what’s causing you to overeat sugar - especially high processed sugar foods. (a.k.a. “sweets”)

When you want to eat healthy and live healthy, but you can’t seem to control your sugar intake, it can be frustrating. You can feel like you have no willpower or discipline when it comes to taming the sugar beast.

There’s also a truth you need to understand about each trigger. In this video you’ll discover the truth.

And you’ll learn the 3 steps to stopping your sugar cravings.

After you watch the video, here’s a challenge.

What is your biggest trigger? Put it in the comments. And - as important - how you will act on the truth.

Sugar. Ah, Honey, Honey

Summer time is lemonade time. And in the south, it’s pitchers of sweet tea on picnics.

A new connection on LI messaged me that she is decreasing the sugar she consumes by eliminating sweet tea and lemonade.

Within a day, a new client found out his A1C is almost double where it should be.

(Side note - A1C measures the average of your blood sugar over a 3 month period.  So he got really motivated to manage his sugar intake.)

A little warning: If you have diabetes or are dealing with an eating disorder, please pay attention to your health care team’s personal advice.  This article is for general information.

How do you lower your sugar intake, without getting into yo-yo dieting?

First, I wanted to see how you consume sugar.  So, this week I reached out to you on LI, IG, and FB.  (And if we aren’t connected on social - you are missing out.  So, wherever you hang out most, let’s connect.)

I asked if you tended to eat sugar, drink it , or avoid it.

Your responses were insightful.

20% drink

50% eat

20% limit

10% avoid

Comments included not consuming processed, but didn’t consider juice -- which is concentrated sugar -- as processed as long as it was fresh juice.

Someone else said they wanted to know how to have discipline and willpower with sugar - so that’s going to be part II

Why is this important?

This is sticky … so let’s be careful not to demonize sugar or make it a saint.

Let’s go to science.  

Sugar is not toxic, at least not in the sense that true poisons are dangerous.

The only health issue sugar is confirmed to cause is tooth decay.

Malnutrition, obesity, and even diabetes have not been shown to be caused directly by sugar itself.

All of these have multiple factors at play.

For example, if sugar is replacing nutrient-rich foods that your body needs, you may get the calories you need for fuel, but not the vitamins and minerals you need. That’s the essence of malnourished.

For diabetes, the evidence is conflicting and interesting.  In some populations in the world, an increase in sugar consumption has tracked with an increase in Type II diabetes.  In other populations, no relation has been found.

However, in some animal studies diets very high in sugar can cause diabetes like disease.

For obesity -- research is clear that you can gain weight whether you eat too much carb whether starch or sugar, protein, or fat.  However, because you can drink sugar, it is easier to get excess calories from processed sugar than from other sources.

What to do?

This is about understanding the principles vs. creating food rules

1.  Know the difference between sugar occurring incidentally in a whole food vs. in processed or concentrated form.

2.  Consume foods in combination.

It is not just about if the food has sugar in it.  It is about how quickly does the food digest and raise your blood sugar … and then if it makes you hungry quicker.

How does sugar fit in with IE?

Three components of IE that I teach you are eating what you really want and eating slowly, savoring your food, and stopping when you are satisfied.

If you are not following a medical diet, then try this experiment.  It is one I’ve used in workshops and with clients for years.

1.  Before you eat or drink something sweet, ask yourself “on a scale of 1-10, how much do I want this now”  and “on a scale of 1-10, how much do I want what I will feel like later”

2.  Second, pay attention to the pleasure of the food or drink.  Perhaps it is not savoring 3 bites of a brownie that is causing issues for you.  Perhaps it is eating multiple brownies, distracted while you watch YouTube videos.

3. Third, when you eat slowly you are more able to stop when you are satisfied.  3 bites might be enough.

How do you handle sugar? Let me know in the comments.

A Secret to Enjoy Cooking

When you aim to cook healthy, sometimes you just plan your meals around “what’s good for me.”

That gets boring in the kitchen.

When you don’t have the energy to cook a healthy meal from scratch, that gets frustrating. It also usually ends in ordering pizza for the third night in a row.

Just like with your exercise, factor in your personality and your energy level.

Do you enjoy creativity? Have a lot of herbs and spices on hand to let your creative thoughts flow. Also, create theme nights — complete with music, games, movies, and food around your theme.

Perhaps you love travel. If you enjoy foods from other cultures, grow their herbs, like lemongrass, and use them in your cooking.

Watch this video for several ideas to celebrate your time in the kitchen

If you like learning, watch YouTube while you chop. (I happen to know a really great channel on healthy living. You are watching it right now :-) )

For the days you are too tired to cook, be sure to have some canned and frozen options that meet your healthy goals. You can’t live your exciting life and not expect to have an “I need rest” night sometimes.

Happy cooking!

Why I Stopped Dieting

It all started because I was trying to fit in … with my family. It created a cycle of Striving. Judgement. Shame.

But also the excitement of “this diet might work” and the false-camaraderie with fellow calorie-counters.

It ended being trapped in food jail, feeling like a failure, and fearing food.

Actually, it ended with my getting free from the diet mentality to enjoy life.

I want the same for you.

Top 10 Reasons to Try Intuitive Eating

If you stop dieting, won’t you lose control with food?

Actually, one of the benefits of Intuitive Eating is you have better control of your self than ever before.

That’s just one of the 10 reasons you’ll learn in this video.

Bonus! Find out the best books to experiment with mindful eating in your own life.

From Skinny Thinking to French Women Don’t Get Fat — there is a book that will jump start your journey into a new relationship with food.

The Dark Side of Dieting

“I hope this new diet will work, but …

I’m tired of trying and failing diets.”

“I’ve got this new healthy eating plan my friend tried.  I wonder if it will work for me - or if I can stick with it.”

If you have ever thought this, then today is your day to break out of food jail.

The idea of dieting, and even healthy eating, raises questions.

First, what is healthy eating, anyway?  How do you define it?  It’s different than a co-worker or friend.

And if you add weight loss as a goal, the answers to that question get even more diverse.

Second, if 95% of diets aren’t stuck with (which is a true stat), is it you that fails or is it something about dieting that doesn’t work?

Third, most important, IS there a way that actually works to improve your health and without adding stress but adding joy to your life?

Understand this: in trying to do good, you are actually doing damage.

The first diet I went on was basic calorie counting, when I was 9, to lose 2 pounds.  Simply because that’s what the women in my family did.

Following that were several other diets …

Is there hope? 

Yes.  Next week I’ll share in detail about getting free from food jail and all of the benefits.  For now, here’s the #1 benefit I’ve experienced in breaking out of food jail.  My mind is free to enjoy, experience, and live life.

I want the same for you.

Meal Kit Delivery - Is it Right for You?

Is a meal kit subscription worth it?  Is it right for you?  What are the pros and cons?  Honest review, not affiliated.

I’ve tried Hello Fresh and Green Chef … here is what is Fantastic and what is a Flop.

(Unfortunately, there is also one Fail.)

Fantastic

• Choose your meals from a pre set selections

• Recipe cards are step by step

• Reuse the great menu ideas

• Eat out less

• Learn to cook

• Ship to a new location when you travel

• HUGE Fun family activity

• Gift idea for wedding gift or baby shower

Flop

• Cannot choose ingredients specific (and some of the ingredients are “if-y” as you’ll see in the video)

• Very little vegetables and lots of starch, not in line with Powerful Plate. Plan to add your own vegetables.

• Time waster: Remember to choose meals IN ADDITION to still grocery planning and shopping for breakfasts, other meals and snacks. 

• Green Chef - says “organic” - but actually the veggies are organic, the meats are conventional.  You are what your dinner ate.

The Fail? Listen in for the shock I got.

Is it for you?

New to cooking or want fewer meals to plan - definitely try it.

Want to switch from eating out as often? Definitely try it

Want new ideas for menus? Yes.

Travel a lot? Yes.

Want something the kids can get in with you easily?  Yes.

Not for you?

If you cook often already, have a mix of menus you are already happy with, have ingredients you are particular about, it is probably not a fit.

How to Eat for Energy on a Long Road Trip

I’m not going to tell you exactly what to eat … that would be crazy.

But I am going to share how you should eat for energy. It does not involve living on carrot sticks. You know me better than that.

Paleo vs Intuitive Eating

Can the Paleo Diet and Lifestyle exist within the framework of Intuitive Eating?

It’s about “why” you re choosing a Paleo Diet. It’s about recognizing the danger of any set way of eating triggering the diet mentality.

Are you eating Paleo “mindfully” - or just chewing on some chicken while you walk around the house and think “I’m healthy.”

Six Reasons You Need to Find Your Unique Path

While growing up I suspected I had developed an unhealthy relationship with food – and sometimes even exercise.  But it was years later at a work potluck Christmas party that I knew I absolutely had a problem and had to change.

Everyone else was at the buffet ooh-ing and ah-ing over different dishes colleagues brought. 

I was in the bathroom terrified. 

“If I eat that _____ I’ll have to workout extra tomorrow. Who knows how many grams of ____ it has.”

“I want to try ____ but if I do I’ll probably not be able to stop eating it.”

“I’ll be good and just have the veggies I brought.  If I break my diet I’ll lose control.”

I realized I was the only one, apparently, who did not feel she could enjoy the food, the people, or the party and I stayed as far away from the table as possible.  Why?  I thought something was wrong with me. 

By that party I had spent almost 20 years fine-tuning my “diet mentality,” through the various diet and exercise rules I learned from the media.

And I wanted freedom.  Desperately.

I wanted to exercise just because it felt amazing and made me strong and healthy. Not because it burned calories I’d eaten the day before.

I wanted to eat a balanced meal because it was satisfying.

I wanted to enjoy a cookie without fear of eating five.

I wanted to go to a party and enjoy it all.

Scratch that.

I didn’t even know that was possible.  All I could fathom was maybe not being consumed with worrying about every morsel, gram, or repercussion after a party.

Thankfully, that part of me is a distant memory, because …

I found my path to THRIVE.

Did you see?

I released a course where I’m going to share with you the mindset, principles, techniques, tools and skills practiced by people who find – and follow – their unique path to health, wellness, and a Thriving Life.

It’s called …

THRIVE LIFE (Go here to learn more; we get started in just a few days.)

While there are so many health benefits to this way of life, the most surprising benefit has nothing to do typical health-parameters.

It has to do with relationships and accomplishing life goals.

Huh?

Let me explain.  Envision that same work party where I locked myself away in the bathroom.  If my mind had been free from food-fear, I would have been mingling with colleagues and enjoying getting to know their families, enriching my relationships.

And when my mental and emotional space is not cluttered with how many calories I eat or burn or how much I do this or that, my mind is free to be creative and pursue dreams.  Plus, there is way less stress.

Here are the six reasons you need to find your own path …

#1 – You stop outsourcing your emotional health to food or over-exercise

You can learn the difference between physical and emotional hunger.

Food was created to bring you pleasure, but it is not what heals hurts or brings peace.

Exercise has many ways that it lifts your mood, but there is a point of using exercise to escape struggles vs. helping you overcome them.

When you sit with discomfort and find what actually fills you emotionally, your strength of self grows.  Your confidence to live and handle difficult situations increases.

#2 – You have mental space to pursue your dreams

This one is huge.

When your mind is cluttered with searching for the next diet or exercise program, or finding recipes that fit the new fad, or shopping for the latest exercise gear you cannot focus on what really matters most to you in life.

It may even go deeper.  If you are staying focused on analyzing food / exercise to avoid dealing with something else, it is time to move forward. 

If you are hiding your best self behind counting this or that, trying to control every bite or workout, it is time to open the curtain and step out on your stage.

#3 – You have increased physical energy

You sleep well, you wake up with energy, and it stays consistent throughout the day so you can accomplish your goals and still enjoy family and friends at the end of the day.

#4 – Your ability to enforce boundaries, with yourself and others, improves

Food police?  Exercise drill sergeant? No more.  Either from others or yourself.

You confidently handle critics.

You also are able to tell yourself “no” when a choice does not value you.

#5 – You have more fun and are more fun to be around

When your excitement comes from discussing the latest fad exercise or diet, it is a boring life.

However, when you have recent adventures or a book you read or a funny family gathering or ____ to talk about, conversations have life in them.

You meet up with people, confident as you accept yourself and others, with less judgement.

Social situations around food are no longer stressful.

You have the physical fitness to enjoy the adventures you want.

#6 – You feel successful, because you are successful

When you learn what works for your body and your lifestyle, and you have the tools and techniques to stick with it, you reach your goals.

You feel successful along the journey because you are living what you value.

#7 – This is a bonus reason because I recently had a conversation with a client and this reason came up – so I added it: 

You become a leader and influencer for good in those around you.

This client was waiting on the inspiration to make changes to come from his circle of family and friends.  I challenged him “Think about who you want to be.  Do you want to be the person who waits to be led or do you want to lead?  Do you want to be influenced or do you want to influence?”  I challenge you, too.  When you find your path to Thrive, you will inspire others to do the same.

This is what finding your path to THRIVE brings you.  It is one of the most amazing adventures you’ll ever go on.

Go here to check out my THRIVE Life course, so you can thrive in YOUR life. 

(We start in a few days.)

A new twist on Mindful Eating

When you hear Mindful Eating what do you picture? A group of monks contemplating the grains of rice in front of them? Of course, it is not the other extreme of driving, yelling (in love) at your kids in the back seat to quit fighting, while eating the burger you picked up in the drive-thru.

Mindful Eating is not about having candlelight at every meal - but it is about the emotional environment you create.

Let’s go back to your high school biology class.  (I know: moan, groan.)  Remember the sympathetic and parasympathetic nervous systems?  Only one of these systems can be dominant at a time.  When you are agitated, excited, upset, in crisis, angry, or stressed the sympathetic nervous system is kicking into gear.  This means that the parasympathetic system is not able to function well.  You may recall that the parasympathetic system controls your digestive system.

Uh, oh.  We have a situation.  The exciting movie you are watching with dinner, the argument you just had with your teenager, the mulling over what your co-worker did, the worrying about whether someone accepts you, or the report that is due at work tomorrow each keep you from digesting your food well. Even just looking at the picture above probably tenses your stomach.

Living in peace and joy is important anytime, but especially at mealtime!  God wants you to be healthy.  He knows that for you to digest your food well, which allows you to absorb the nutrients to “renew your youth,” you need to be joyful and peaceful when you eat.

This also includes allowing God to be the emotional lift that you need.  Many of us (especially those of us who were chronic dieters) have trained ourselves to dull (or distract) negative emotions through eating.  When you are angry or sad or bored, before you open the pantry out of habit, tell God what you are feeling.  Ask Him to show you how to process your emotions.  God will give you strength to tolerate the discomfort until it naturally passes, which it often does.  He will give you wisdom to change the thoughts causing the emotions.  He will show you answers to stressful situations.  God will heal your heartache.

Diet lessons from a 100 year old textbook

Science progresses and the old ideas we have lived by are built upon or changed.  We go to school, learn, experiment, update the knowledge base, and then start over again, mentoring the next generation to do the same.  That is an ideal. 

Unfortunately, one area seems to have stopped with this textbook from 1916.  Repackaged?  Yes. New versions? Yes.  But current long-term research no longer backs up what is taught in this book and through modern media versions.

The picture above is a 100+ year old chamber to measure the metabolic requirement of babies.  The technology has progressed, but the science is principally the same.  I have stayed overnight, for several research studies, in the metabolic chamber at Vanderbilt University Medical Center.  (In case you are wondering, it is a small room with a bed, desk, and window.)  This technology measures how many calories a person burns during the time they are in the chamber.

This device measures the calorie content of food.  Again, technology may look different 100 years ago, but the basic science is as today.

So, what is the problem?  Calories burned.  Calories eaten.  Simple math, right?

That is what was assumed 100 years ago.  I actually have nothing harsh to say about what they taught then.  For then.

1400 

calories a day for a man to lose weight

1000

calories a day for a woman to lose weight

They taught the latest information they had.  However, the knowledge base has changed since then.  Research shows (though seldom promoted by diet gurus) -

• restricting calories this low decreases muscle mass and metabolism
• counting (carbs, calories, fat, protein) distorts your relationship with food and creates food obsessions
• living with food rules increases binge eating
• dieting of all kinds decreases trust of yourself and food
• dieting fails long-term 90-98% of the time (a.k.a. you gain the weight back, usually plus some)
• food restrictions negatively impact relationships and mental health

So, what is a healthy way to eat?

• Listen to when your body tells you to eat.
• Learn what foods make you feel fantastic and energetic, and which ones don't.
• Give yourself unconditional permission to eat - even the foods that don't make you feel great.  When you truly want them, eat them fully aware of the result and without any guilt.
• Savor the food you eat.  Turn off the TV and put down the screen.  (Hint: research also reveals that we eat 10% more when multi-tasking a meal.)
• Stop when you are no longer physically hungry.
• Trust that your body wants to be at a healthy weight and it will tell you what to do.

Next time you are tempted with "I'm going to try the new ABCXYD diet" (no, that is not a new diet - at least not one I've heard of), remember it is really not new. 

It's just the newest flavor of the dieting that gained ground during the Victorian era.  (That is a history lesson for another post.)

If you truly want to try the latest and greatest research has to offer, experiment with the list above.  It is mindful-intuitive eating.  And it works. 

A Powerful Plate

Want more power in your life?  Start with two essentials:  sleep and what you put on your plate.  On your plate, it is not as much specific foods for energy, as it is categories of food in certain ratios.

Let me know what your favorites are for your Powerful Plate!