{Pop Quiz} Are you a Path Finder?

As crazy as this may sound, I want you to take a moment to imagine this:

Imagine a world where you *really* ignored the voices saying that there is only one way to live healthy and you have to conform to that only-one-way?

How would you live?

What would your relationship with food, with others, with yourself be like?

How would you move?

What would you experience?

Yes, it takes practice, but you can become a person who is unphased by what other people or the media say about how you should live your health.

But, it doesn’t just stop there.

Picture yourself:

·         Waking up refreshed with energy, excited about the day.

·         Sticking with new healthy habits, as they come easier for you.

·         Not worrying about “lifestyle diseases” – maybe even with a decrease in meds.

·         Enjoying peace in your relationship with food, not scared of it.

·         Discovering new physical activities that enhance all of your life.

·         Savoring meals, without guilt and shame.

·         Enjoying life – whether big adventures or intimate family time – free of physical, emotional, or social limitations.

Would you believe it’s possible?

It is . . . and the “how” is your being a Path Finder: finding your path to Thrive.

What are the traits of a Path Finder?  I’ve identified 7 qualities of a Path Finder –

#1 – PRACTICE Mindset

#2 – PRINCIPLES Lifestyle

#3 – PERSONALITY Focus

#4 – True PLEASURE Awareness

#5 – PEOPLE and Resource Seeker

#6 – PRESENT

#7 – POSITIVE POSITION

Do you embody these 7 traits of a Path Finder?

Finding a path in Colorado

POP   QUIZ   TIME

Have you ever …

A) Decided to skip exercise because there wasn’t time for “all” of it?

B) Felt frustration because you tried and failed a program?

C) Been unable to stop the food police from telling you what you should or shouldn’t eat?

D) Beaten yourself up because of something (or how much) you ate?

E) Told yourself “What’s the point?” about a new healthy habit you tried?

F) Felt unable to relax as you multi-tasked a meal, or even a walk in nature?

G) Missed an important experience with your mind elsewhere?

Did you say “yes” to any of the questions?

You are not alone. 

At one time or another, we have all been there, done that, thought that.

Please DO NOT beat yourself up.

It is because of the lies we are taught by well-meaning family/friends and by the media.

Fortunately, it is never too late to discover and embrace the truth.

Here are some basic ways to begin to understand the 7 qualities of a Path Finder:

Finding a path in Utah

#1 – PRACTICE Mindset

            Experimenting with ways of eating and moving, with a lot of compassion for yourself.

#2 – PRINCIPLES Lifestyle

            Learning the principles (not rigid rules) of healthy living, based on research – adapting them as life situations change.

#3 – PERSONALITY Focus

            Discovering what is fun for your personality, your preferences, your needs.

#4 – True PLEASURE Awareness

            Knowing that false-pleasure never really satisfies, choosing what actually satisfies you.

#5 – PEOPLE and Resource Seeker

            Finding out what is stopping you from achieving your goals and then finding the people and resources that will help you.

#6 – PRESENT

            Embracing where you are and experiencing the present moment

#7 – POSITIVE POSITION

            Believing that you can do it, consuming only messages that reinforce your beliefs and dreams, and focusing on your reasons.

Learning and practicing these 7 qualities will change your life for the better.  I promise.

How much do you desire to Find Your own Path to Thrive?

I hope a lot (because it changes everything!)

Let’s keep this discussion going.

The #1 Way to Wreck Your Path and Six Signs You May Be Wrecking Yours

Here’s a question that I consistently hear: “I’m tired of doing what doesn’t work.  How do I get results?”

You buy the latest diet book every friend swears by – but then they swore by a different one 3 months ago.

You join a different gym or buy another late-night-TV fitness gadget, because this one has (fill in the blank) that the others didn’t have, so you know you’ll use it – next week.

You download another meditation or time-tracker or motivation app, but somehow it doesn’t help.

How do you get results?

Before I share how, I want you to understand that the answer goes against what main stream media and well-meaning fitness gurus will tell you.  It even goes against what my mom taught me (and it took me a while to accept that).

Here’s the answer: Find your path.

A path that is yours, that embraces your lifestyle and values, that enhances your life without consuming it. Why?  Because if it does not focus on you, no program, book, gadget or method will work for you.

Finding your path paves the way to

• greater energy

• freedom from worrying about lifestyle diseases

• peace in your mind and with yourself

• an increased enjoyment of life – whether big adventures or time with family

• thriving in every area of your life

Go here to enroll in my newest course … Thrive Life

You can find your path to results.  Your first step, which – I know from experience - is the hardest, is to stop believing what I call the Big Lie.  It wrecks your path.

It pushes you further away from success and traps you in bondage.  The lie, like most, is subtle in your mind, but you can see signs of it wrecking your path. 

At the end I’ll tell you 6 signs that you may be believing the Big Lie.

First, I’ll share a bit of my story of believing this Big Lie and how it harmed me for well over 25 years of my life.

I used to be deeply trapped in this lie.

When I was 9 I started believing it.  I bought my first fitness magazine and started on my first diet.  The magazine (this one – this is the original one) became an authority figure in my life, telling me that I was supposed to eat and exercise a certain way.

I counted the calories on my plate; I analyzed the food on my parents’ plates when we’d go out to eat.  In fact, my dad later told me they stopped enjoying going out as a family because all I did was analyze what everyone was eating.  I wouldn’t skip exercise, even if it meant getting out of bed with a fever to finish it. 

Yes, I did that.

The deeper I got into this lie, the more restricted I became.  Others thought I was self-disciplined – but I wasn’t.  Self-discipline comes from the inside, from the self.  I was forcing conformity to an outside, external, someone else’s rule.

(A little side-lesson here … we all have a need for autonomy, that thing that protects us and our boundaries, our sense of self and our ability to choose.  I allowed this magazine – and later all of the other diet rules – to tell me what to do.  It was my job to tell me that, so I was allowing my sense of autonomy to be pushed down.  And it will only be pushed down so long.)

I remember in college going to parties, eating “perfectly” but then coming back to an apartment and eating ½ bag of my roommates cookies.

I was recently reading some of my old journals, which at the time included daily calorie counts.  I came across a section in which I was berating myself for sneak eating several doughnuts.  At the time I wrote it, I recall thinking how “bad” I was.  When I look at it now, I understand that I was starving myself for several days prior, through both under-eating and running several miles.  No wonder I was craving doughnuts.

Of course, the good news now that I don’t believe the lie anymore, I could care less about doughnuts and actually don’t like them.

So, what is the Big Lie? 

“There’s one way to be healthy and you must conform your life to that one way.”

You absolutely must give up believing this lie to reach your health and fitness goals.

Each person’s path is unique, but not random.  Your path will be based on underlying proven principles, but if you believe that there is one way to live healthy, you will be forever trying things that don’t work in the long-run and will always be searching outside of yourself. 

• Those ways create struggle, not ease.

• Those ways are complicated, not simple.

• Those ways constrict and deprive you, not free you.

Are you possibly believing the lie that here is one way to be healthy and you must conform your life to that one way?

Sign #1: You skip exercise or meal-prep because something else came up.  Why?  You didn’t have time to do it “all” and you’ve believed all-or-none; don’t do something half-way.

Your Path? You believe something is better than nothing and set standards that fit your life.

Sign #2: You go workout and push yourself until you cannot walk normally the next day, then don’t workout again for weeks.  Why?  You’ve believed “No pain – no gain,” or “go hard or go home.”  Or a guru has told you that if you don’t get your heartrate into a certain zone it does you no good.

Your Path? You embrace the intensity of exercise you enjoy.

Sign #3: You eat foods that bore you, or you feel guilty if you eat something you really enjoy. Why?  Someone has been the food police and told you, “If it tastes good, spit it out.  It can’t be good for you.”

Your Path? You listen for true pleasure (not false pleasure) and savor quality.

Sign #4: You are busy and don’t exercise, believing if you don’t exercise for ____ time it won’t do you any good.

Your Path? You know the research and that helps you adapt to your life. Some days you go exercise and some days you fit in bits of activity throughout your day.

Sign #5: This ____ diet is the one that works.  It worked for so-and-so celebrity last year.

Well, that was last year.  This _____ diet is the one that really works.  It worked for so-and-so celebrity this year.  And if it is not working for you, you must be cheating.

Your Path? You understand what works for your body and you know that what you eat is not a moral issue.

Sign #6: You avoid going to a party, trying a new adventure, or just going to the gym because you have to look a certain way, touch your toes, lift a lot of weight, run a particular pace – or you are really unfit and you aren’t trying.

Your path?  You go enjoy your life, because you ignore the confining opinions and messages out there.

These lies push you further away from success.

If you want to find your path to results, you must decide once and for all that the hype and the lies, no matter how glorious and glittery they sound, are not for you.

I get it.

Rejecting the lies can be hard, but do you know what’s even harder?

Continuing to try every new one-size-fits-all rule, failing, feeling guilty and trapped.

This is why learning to find your path to Thrive in Life will be one of the most amazing gifts you’ll ever give yourself.

I am thrilled to let you know that enrollment is open for my newest course: Thrive Life. Click here for details.

Join the conversation – Which of the six signs are you guilty of that is wrecking your path?  What is one small thing you can do TODAY to help you break out of the lies and Thrive?

Why self-care is important: one client's story

A picture is worth a thousand words.

So, since this is a picture plus words, how many does that equal?

Seriously, this is a powerful visual I’ve used to illustrate the impact of self-care.

Top Ten Tips for Aging Healthy

I don’t like the term “anti-aging” because it somehow implies aging is a bad thing. It is not only not a bad thing, it is an inevitable thing you’ve done a few seconds of since opening this post and reading it.

Your goal is not to prevent aging but to age well. I’ll go a step further. Your goal is to get to your 90+ year old self, look back with bright eyes in a strong body and say “Yes! That was the way to live.”

So, how do you create that strong life lived?

Here are the top ten tips from my two favorite age-well books:

1. Keep your arteries healthy. Not very glamorous sounding, I know. But this guards against heart attack, stroke, memory loss, vascular disease, and even some wrinkles. Markers to watch? Blood pressure and C-reactive protein (for inflammation). Actions to take? Exercise, eat several vegetable servings a day, and get your annual check up.

2. Pump up your immune system. Actions to take? Enjoy tomato sauces regularly, get your vitamin D, and see your dentist to prevent periodontal disease which increases inflammation in your body.

3. Avoid smoking. Actions to take? Simple. Either don’t start or get whatever help you need to stop.

4. Manage your stress. I literally mean your stress. What stresses your friends or spouse or neighbor may not stress you. And how you manage it may be different than their method, too. Actions to take? List what the major stressors are in your life and find ways to eliminate, work around, or re-frame them. Also, this month try at least one new way plus a “tried-and-true” to relieve your stress. (Hmmm…makes me want to break out my favorite old comedy, “Oscar”.)

5. Increase your circle of friends and deepen the relationships you have. Your social network is shown in numerous studies to not only increase life satisfaction, but lengthen your life as well.

6. Get it out. If you have experienced secret traumas in your life and you have not processed them yet, please seek counsel. The silence is killing you.

7. Manage your money. In both books this is directly or indirectly covered as a means to lower your stress and provide for your needs throughout your life.

8. Discover your purpose. Even if you haven’t found your “big calling” in life, focus on finding meaning in the everyday things you do and enjoy.

9. Find faith. In one study “the risk of dying over nearly three decades was 36 percent lower for frequent church attendees than for infrequent attendees.” In Emotional Longevity the author tells a powerful story of Maya Angelou’s faith for her son’s physical healing. The doctors said he would be paralyzed. She said “Thank God, my son will walk out of this hospital.” Three days later he moved his toes.

10. Live in positive emotions. Walk through negative ones. Sadness, grief, anxiety will come. Your ability to come through those and back into a positive place increases your “resiliency” and ability to age healthy.

Here’s to your 90 year old self, saying “Well done. Now watch this,” while you wink at your great grandkids.

(Books: Emotional Longevity by Norman B. Anderson, Ph.D. and The Real Age Makeover by Michael F. Roizen, M.D.)